Tbt kids tales!

I haven't done one of these in a while! 

Once upon a time, my nephew thought he'd be tough. He was about 7 at the time. He and another kid exchanged words at the playground. My nephew, thought he'd be cool and say, "come at me, bro." 

Well the kid did. Came at him with a swift kick to the nuts. 

Moral of the story- don't let your mouth write a check that your ass can't cash. 

Tbt- kids tales.

Once upon a time- I took Stephen, who was 4 at the time, to the grocery store. He wanted hot dogs and I told him no, it wasn't on the list. He was walking beside the cart, and I was pushing. I walked over to look at the meat, and made a fatal mistake. I turned my back. Stephen, grabbed the cart and pushed it as hard as he could. I ran after the cart; and He grabbed hot dogs and ran the opposite direction.

Moral of the story: they're smarter than us. Don't turn your back- EVER!

Tbt- I'm not very nice pregnant.

I'm not very nice as a pregnant person. Some of the stories are well, down right embarrassing. So, I'll share one of them here!!

Once Upon a Time, in a land country as hell (aka Orangefield, Texas) I was riding in the car with my friend Christine. She was driving and we were going to the gas station. I was about 6 months pregnant with Dade. This lady cut us off. I did what and normal irritable pregnant person would do and rolled down my window (it was a crank! Memories!) and hung my head and every thing out of the window, and yelled, "HEY! HEY!" The girl turned to look, Christine was dying in the drivers seat, pulling on the back of my maternity top. I then screamed out, "C*NT LICKER!" Complete with the obscene mouth gesture and everything. I, now vidicated, sat back down in the seat. Christine punched it and hauled it out of there. 

Moral of the story: you can't take me anywhere. 

Meh~

I am not myself today. I'm not feeling great, thanks allergies. I'm a bit overwhelmed, fighting with Lamar over an old bill from when I withdrew, fighting with Dade's school over a warning vs a referral. It's all a bit much right now. Something you forget about the first trimester is the deep bone tired exhaustion you feel. I just don't have it in me. I think I need an extended 7 day nap.

I don't feel like blogging much today. I don't have a tbt for you, but I do have this picture. 

This is from baby Eric's (now 4) first hair cut. He is one here. Wasn't he cute? Anyway, my beautician is amazing. She kept him occupied and distracted with a sucker. No tears! Yay Karla! 

Tbt

So it's throw back Thursday. Normally I'd share a little story with a moral or something, but I got nothing today- well there is the time Stephen shop lifted hot dogs... But no. I'll instead leave you with this awful picture. The moral this: if you're bad in church your sister will get a sucker and you won't. Oh and perms? Never a good idea.

Tbt- kids tales

I was induced for Dade. The labor only lasted about two hours, he was a very easy birth. When he was presented to us, we looked at him. His dad looked at him, and looked at me. He said, "is he cute?" And I looked down and replied, "no".

Moral of the story: Not all babies are born cute. Some have to grow into it. 

Caveat: he's very handsome now! See, proud parents!  Also pictured- THE EX. It's ok, we're cool. 

Throw Back Thursday- Kids Tales

Once upon a time, Dade and I were arguing about something. He was about twelve at the time. All of a sudden, he turned and looked at me. He said, "you just feel that way because you haven't found Jesus."  To which I casually replied, "yes I did, he was hiding behind the sofa."  Dade's mouth dropped open, he looked at me and walked off. I hear his voice drift back to me from the hall, "I don't even know what to say to that...."

Moral of the story: Don't sass your mama. She has a comeback bank with 30+ years of sassy deposits

TBT- Kid's Tales

Once upon a time: S was home from college for winter break, and E was watching The Little Mermaid. Prince Eric was on screen and E said,"look, Stefan, that's me, Eric!" S looked at me and sneered. "Really, mom? You named your kid from a Disney movie?"  I looked at my oldest child and smiled, "what's wrong with that, King Stefan from Sleeping Beauty?"

Moral of the story: Don't knock your mom's name game.

Throw Back Thursday: Kid Tales

Once upon a time, D had a Jr. Hi Band concert.  The whole family attended this musical wonder. After the concert, my parents and I were all walking back to the car when my mom said the magical words, "Do you want to go to Dairy Queen?" Hell yeah! We all took separate cars, so we all decided to meet there.  In our town, DQ is right around the corner from the school; it's within walking distance. S was in the front seat, I loaded E into his car seat, and we were off!  We pull into the parking spot and I turn around. The seat next to E's was empty! I asked S, "Uhhhh where's Dade?" His response? "God, mom, you were so excited about ice cream, you forgot about your own child. What kind of parent are you?" (Did I mention he's 19? and cynical?) So back to the school we went. Turns out while I was loading Eric in his car seat D went and put his horn up in the band hall with the other students. We pull to the school and I don't see him. I call him.

Me - Where are you?
D- I'm looking, but I can't find you anywhere!
Me- We're over here by these dumpsters.

He shows up and gets in the car.  S looks at him and says, "God, Dade, we've been waiting for you forever. "

Moral of the story, raise your kids right and they'll cover for you.