Movie Review MORTAL KOMBAT

 I expected lameness.  Yes, yes I did. Let's just face it, movies based on video games are lame. No, The Witcher does not count, it was a book series first. Go read it. It predates Game of Thrones and so so good. Back to my point, movies based on video games are lame. Street Fighter was a complete disaster. Mario Brothers?  Lame.  The first MORTAL Kombat Movies? SUPER LAME. Resident Evil? Lame lame lame lame.  The most recent exception to this rule is Sonic, but had the fans not complained about creepy animated Sonic it would have been doomed to lameness for all eternity. 

THIS MOVIE COULD BE CONSIDERED SENSITIVE FOR SOME CHILDREN. 

***** SPOILERS AHEAD******

YOURE READING AT YOUR OWN RISK. 

Now, new MORTAL KOMBAT movie. I fully expected lameness. What I did not expect was a fun story line, gruesome fatalities, and gratuitous violence. It was 100% amazing and I am here for it. The best part if this was that this movie did not take itself too seriously. It know it was a video game movie, and it embraced it. It was FUN.  I throughly enjoyed Lou Kang riding Harpy Chick like a surfboard into his saw hat. 

Kano is a complete asshole and I loved him. The more of a complete dick he was the happier it made me. He really was one of my favorites. Seeing Kabal in action was amazing. Goro was well done and I didn't feel like I was watching ridiculous CGI. 

In addition the use of the OG MORTAL KOMBAT theme was the chef's kiss. 

I really hope there is a sequel. 

***** END SPOILERS******

Why could MORTAL KOMBAT be sensitive for some Children? 

Gratuitous violence and Vulgarity. The F bomb is thrown around like glitter at a craft fair. Blood, gore, and entrails. There was absolutely no romance in this movie. I mean my kids watched it- I don't censor. Come at me. 

Now, this whole HBO MAX is amazing. I love love love being able to watch movie in the comfort of my own home and eat snacks in my comfy chair. I may never go to the movies again.  

I would 100% watch this movie again. 

10/10. 

What in tarnation?

Why are kids so weird? Look at this  just look at it. Who sleeps like this? How is it even possible? I don't even understand.

Book review: Drawn to the Marquess by Bronwen Evans

I love love love Regency Romance.  Go ahead, judge me, I don't care.  These books are light hearted and hella fun. I'm a sucker for the Ton and a happy ending. Bonus points if Beau Brummel is mentioned. Extra extra points if they have to get approval to Waltz.

This book, Drawn to the Marquess, is a little misleading. It is a historical, and made a passing mention of the ton.  The heroine was ostracized by society and is reclusive.  She ropes the handsome Marquess into helping her prove her innocence in the death of her husband, who we learn is just the absolute worst.  Most of the book takes place in the country away from the ton. She wasn't so much drawn to the marquess as she was trying to trick him into working for him. I'm not so sure the title fits.  The story itself started out pretty slow, then picked up speed.  I'd rate it 4 out of 5.  I was entertained, but would not read again. 

I’m a Nelson Ratings person!

Oh I’m so excited. They’re sending me a journal and everything. Only problem is- in the worst tv watcher ever. Every show I’ve loved has gotten cancelled

Selfie- modern day My Fair Lady! What’s not to love???

Dallas- come on, the Dallas reboot was so awesome. And John Ross was sooooo hot. Did you notice his eyes were 2 different colors? Rwar!

Telenovella- This was cute! About a soap opera star that couldn’t speak Spanish. Loved it.

GCB- based off a book that wasn’t all that great, it was cute- and ended on a cliff hanger. Whyyyyyyy? And the cliff hanger wasn’t in the book!!!!!

So there. That’s the last few shows I loved. I watched Gossip Girl from episode one till way after the writers lost interest. I gave up on Revenge. I give up on a lot of shows... (sorry Jamie) 

Hopefully there is some decent tv for me to journal. Rick and Morty FTW! 

Let’s talk AHS Cult

I hate clowns. Needless to say, I haven’t been a fan of this season so far. Well last night’s show finally redeemed itself. Let’s chat! If you haven’t seen season 3 of American Horror Story: Cult and want it to remain a surprise stop reading now. Move on, watch a make up tutorial or something, nothing to see here. This is not the blog post you are looking for. Meanwhile....

Spoilers ahead

Theories ahead

All clear?

Ok good.  So the opening sequence with the lady and her husband conquering her fear; only to be killed by the clown possee the same way? Ooooooooo! Ok so the doctor has to be in on it. He has to exploit people by their fears. Does he murder them when they are cured? Conquer your fear and get murdered? A friend (thanks Jonathan!) pointed out that the doctor had smiley face buttons in his office. Everything is a clue in AHS. 

And wow when Kai slapped Meadow! Yasssss! I wanted to slap her too for that stupid statement. So obviously they’re part of the cult.  And hot cop and neighbor dude are obviously a thing. So how did Oz get the video of Ally and Winter? I can’t believe Ivy slapped her! A lot of hitting going on in this episode. 

So both Ally and crazy neighbors have the smiley face Target on their house somewhere. However, the neighbors are part of the Kai cult. Now is the Kai Cult the same as the Doctor Cult? Is this like west side story AHS version? They’ve burst into song on previous seasons, so it would not surprise me. 

Lets talk names. Ivy, Winter, Meadow. Even Kai means Ocean in Hawaiian. And the doctor- Dr Rudy? Rudy means famed Wolf. A wolf in docs clothing maybe. Hmmmmmmm. I see on IMDB we will be getting a character named Serenity. Cult member? Probably. 

Who is the mastermind behind the cult? Who is the leader? I think we have just scratched the surface.  Can’t wait for next week!!!!!

Book Review: The Selection by Kiera Cass

This is a young adult novel. I had heard good things, and decided to give it a go. This book is set in a future where the United States no longer exist. North America is now Illena and is ruled by a monarchy. The prince needs to find a wife, so they have a selection. Kind of a Hunger Games/Lottery type, but with catty bitches instead of people trying to kill each other. The story follows a Selection hopefully called America. She is in a lower caste (apparently they've gone to a caste system now) and she is selected in the bridal pool. 

I could not put this book down. It wasn't all romance, it's about adjusting and coming to terms with heartbreak, and some suspicious activity. Why did the reporter have a weird star shaped broach? What are the rebels looking for? 

I really enjoyed this book, and I'm about to start on the next in the series, The Elite. 

Find it here: The Selection https://www.amazon.com/dp/0062059947/ref=cm_sw_r_sms_c_api_jiFVzb981J12J

Rating 10/10 would read again. 

I hate mornings too.

Devil baby hates to wake up. He's going to be one of those kids. I can see it now, the copious amounts of ice water I am going to have to throw on him, the yelling, the pleading, and the late days to work.  Without further ado, here's the foreshadowing.
https://youtu.be/OM05RFlkjhs